Holy shit! This guy had his hands and feet handcuffed and was scooting across the interstate and we almost hit him because it was so dark. I hate Louisiana.
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
i just woke up to a text from him apologizing for making me eat a full lemon
He snuck out of bed at 9 am and came back with pizza and a bottle of wine. I think I'm in love!
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
next time we make out at a concert please try to refrain from screaming out our hotel room number.. the amount of guys that knocked on our door after you passed out was ridiculous
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
Dude, my sex life is so sad since I started having feelings.
Sleeping with just one person sucks
My favorite part of you downing a fifth of fireball in my apartment by yourself is the shot glass in the sink. It's like you attempted moderation and were just like "Fuck this."
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
Randomize
