We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
Oh my god I found my bf's erotica
OH MY GOD HE WROTE THIS EROTICA.
OH MY GOD THIS IS GOOD EROTICA.
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
I'M GOING TO DIE ALONE WITHOUT ANYONE PRETENDING TO BE A MARRIED COUPLE WHILE DRUNK AT A MALL WITH ME
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
Apparently I told the mayor I want to be a trophy wife
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