I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
I woke up in the penthouse and did lines off the to of the fireplace. This is not real.
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.
What are your plans?
Get picked up. Convince you to leave work. Smoke. Drink. Fly helicopters.
If there is a ladylike way to throw up in your favorite toilet, I just did it.
I mean, he's 40, foreign, artsy but with substance abuse problems and estranged children. How is he not my type?
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
I can now recognize that when my wine bottle reaches a certain point, I probably shouldn't tweet, text or call anyone. RESPONSIBILITY
Yeeah, I think a threesome is one of those wedding presents you can't register for at Bed Bath And Beyond..
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
Randomize