how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
I am drinking ovaltine with peppermint schnapps. My childhood could have been so much better.
I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
I must have drunkenly masturbated really loud last night, cause my roommate and his wife wont look at me
Found the puke drawer
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
It is NEVER not funny to me when I am sitting at a table and I've touched the dicks of every single person I'm sitting with.
Randomize