So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
I'm waiting for seagulls to eat this throw up
I'm exhausted and I have velveeta stuck in my teeth
Did you eat out Derrek's girlfriend again?
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
im holly from the hills drunk
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
Is it possible to get a DUI in a wheelchair that's not yours?
I am too young to be this hungover
Is this your way of saying you want a sober 19th?
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
My high school reunion is Thursday so I need to find an outfit that says "Haha, you got fat and I got tits. Suck it, bitches."
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
You just can't go back to being friends with someone after you sucked their balls
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
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