fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
i upgraded from drunk texts to drunk e-mails...real world here i come
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers!
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
I just Miyagied my roommate through her first set of tit pics. Her fuck buddy owes me.
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
I met her parents last night. Her dad smelled like weed and kept yelling "I HAVE ALLERGIES AHHH MY EYES ARE BURNING!" During dinner It had to be good weed he didn't even know he was yelling.
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
Note to self: never fuck a Canadian, surprisingly highly disappointing
Sorry for trying to wake you up by slapping your ass with a fruit 2 go.
Last 4 google searches: class c felony, scary ghosts, peanut butter jelly time, Lindsey lohans vagina
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