we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
If you dont, I will tell Dad you are gay.
Fine, and I will tell him you fucked his business partner
Previous statement retracted.
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
Well, we broke up and instead of putting my shit out on the curb like a normal person, she fucking donated everything to Goodwill. So now I have to pay two dollars for one of my own t shirts.
my mom called me mid shot and i accidentally answered and kept calling her my own name. somehow i thought that would help the situation.
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
Pretty sure keeping my vibrator in the same drawer with the weed makes it work better. I fall asleep almost immedi
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
I'm gonna go parent style on your ass... I don't ask much from you but if you could please just come get shitfaced with me I would really appreciate it
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
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