Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
Lets go to the mall and pick up some fat chicks and take them out tonight so we can be the skinny friends
I just ate a cashew that looked EXACTLY like your dick.
I hate it when she philosophizes drunkenly on my kitchen counter. not even sober do i understand latin.
Woke up shivering behind the titty bar, With the worst leg cramps. I'm like a poster boy for responsibility.
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
I behisseth at your soul from the deepest darkest depths of the earth
Dude mama brought home the bacon, i got his HBO account i guess that makes up for his by par skills in bed.
Thought for a game. Duck, Duck, Grey Goose. If you're tapped, you take a shot. Then proceed as normal.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
So random question: what's a good way to tell your brother that his Skype sex kept you awake last night? I'm not really sure how that conversation begins.
Randomize
