We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.
i woke up with a grocery list signed by "the people who ate all your shit while you were passed out"
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
I actually have to watch Breaking Bad to make me feel better about my choices last night.
Balls deep in an Orange is the New Black marathon. Bring food and drugs.
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
i just looked at those "hey" messages and i was so confused and then i remembered we were practicing texting with our tongues.
Randomize
