I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
You tried to convince her that if she gave you head she'd hear the ocean.....
I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
It says a lot about how well I know you when I can understand messages of yours that say things like "sauteed Jesus."
Why is there bacon braided in my hair
i knew it was time to leave the bar when i caught myself doing karate dance moves with a married man.
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
Dad just asked me to breathalyze grandma
I lowered my expectations when he started off saying "ah missionary, my specialty"
also, sleeping with your chipotle guy sounds like a good idea until you want chipotle on your day off and have to look somewhat presentable to acquire said chipotle.
Just sitting here contemplating the meaning of life.
So you're drunk waiting for the bus.
A condom was pulled out of your vagina by a doctor today I do not think you can pull off "closet" hoe anymore
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