with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
someone put bongwater in my humidifier again THIS NEEDS TO STOP
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
Just burnt my nuts with a cigarette. Don't ask. I hate life.
Hey, I'm renting a storage locker for the summer to keep all my bondage shit in so my parents don't see it. You wanna split on it for your all your weed shit?
Oh my fucking god how fucking embarrassing never again will I mix drugs at a family barbecue
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
After my shift today I'm going on a bender. Not saying this so you'll stop me, just a heads up to invest in Tylenol, Gatorade, and Jack
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
Note to self: NEVER have sex with anyone who is experiencing explosive diarrhea.
I've never been so happy to be celibate.
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