oh my god, i just wanna eat cake off your dick
i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
Helped an old lady on crutches throw away her mcdonalds, carried her stuff to the car and helped her get in...most productive cinco de mayo hands down
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
Also, we accidentally donated a bong to goodwill
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
I live vicariously through you. No one mistakes me for a hooker anymore. I look like a stay at home mom of three. On bad days of four.
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
I just want to be like "i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it"
Hey.. Lock your door. There's a drunk girl walking around in here. She just came in my room and peed on my chair.
Randomize
