Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
Im at the hospital with monitors on and a giant green top hat. i blew a 24somethin. Im fucked.
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
It's hard to be above the influence when you are the influence.
I don't know if it's the amount i drank last night or the number of taylor swift statuses on facebook but i feel like puking everywhere
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
Wait.....I ate a raw potato lastnight.
i'm really sorry, but i'm just not sober enough to make good decisions.
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
I dont think the chain smoking, tequila shots or cocaine was good for my bronchitis.
That married penis I’ve been riding offered to pay off my student loans. I was going to break it off because he has lousy stamina. Is being debt free worth putting up with mediocre sex?
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