I'm totally gay for Miss Californiaaaaaa
oh sweet, sweet irony
can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
No subtext here. People are naked.
Well he's not a stripper, so we're already doing better than my last date.
way to not show up for Habitat for Humanity, real classy...
I saved lives by not driving this morning
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
Just set myself on fire a little bit. Made me think of you.
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
Godammit I caught my hair on fire taking a bong rip
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Randomize
