come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
Can you get arrested or in trouble for punching a dead relative in a casket?
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
I met a pornstar at his bachelor party and signed his shirt giving him wedding advice
Fuck romance. Just shaved my nipples in the shower because I felt like it. That's the life I'm about.
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
Dude I woke up with a handprint shaped bruise on my ass, a pong ball in my cleavage, and somebody else's gold chain around my neck. Who's house am I in?
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
He knocked me over backwards in my chair. I had a beer in each hand. Didn't spill a drop.
They made the paper for stealing gnomes. I fucked a local celebrity.
Randomize
