i don't want you to think of me as your TA
So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
I wish pancakes were everywhere. Just pancakes. I want lilies at my wedding. No dress. Just priest. Just lilies.
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
I love THIS fish, the rest of the ocean can go fuck itself. I am ahab and he is my whale
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
Martha Stewart has had a one night stand and is unsure if she's had a threesome. I no longer feel slutty.
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
Randomize
