dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
Just mindlessly walked into the mens bathroom. My vagina has now become its own independent being, looking for penises. I'm just along for the ride.
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
Someone downtown drunkenly stole the antenna off of her car... while she was driving.
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
If I could I'd magically teleport drugs and alcohol to you. Like a bad decision fairy.
I miss you and I miss your weed. Come home.
Randomize
