We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
I was officially considered the drunkest person in cuba when the bartender at the swim up bar made me wear a life jacket for 'safety purposes'
In one night, this kid threw a firecracker under a fucking cop car, crashed three seperate parties, and passed out in a tree in our backyard. Do you even know who he is?
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
You kind of have a nervous, desperate thing going on that isn't exactly catnip for bitches
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
that's how you measure success
By how bad my vagina hurts on a Tuesday morning while I'm trying to figure out how I got white girl wasted on a Monday?
You sprinted into the side of a parked car
Don't be surprised if I hand out mini dildos on Halloween
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
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