apparently i was offering everyone ambien and shouting, it's only like heath ledger if you want it to be!
I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
I just spent 30 minutes cleaning out my coleman grill. Did you really have to have grilled yogurt?
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
I look like a zombie and smell like a stripper. Its gonna be a good day.
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
I swear to god, if you fuck the hot one you're paying me back for the shot I just bought her
I love THIS fish, the rest of the ocean can go fuck itself. I am ahab and he is my whale
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
The weekend was a blur. There was vodka and penises and orgasms. I played a game of Cock Roulette and won big
Randomize
