i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
Drunk puking in my bathtub has plugged it up for the third time this year. I hate these calls to my landlord.
captain cockblock got me again last night so i put a squirrel in his room and jamed the door shut
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
Your boyfriends underwear are hanging from my kitchen window. Where the fuck are you?!
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
Just bought a dildo. Happy first time single in four years Valentine's Day to me
My drunk ass is being chauffeured around like the damn queen of England
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
Randomize
