is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
I'm going to replace you with a friend who will be happy when I find a huge penis
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
The cab driver was nice enough to let you finish your beer in the car, but you crossed the line when you started to pee in the empty bottle
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
i'm pretty sure i can feel a baby kicking just looking at him. if he didnt impregnate you, you officially have an iron-clad uterus.
I passed out and slept in my car. Now I feel like a hungover zoo animal. Look and laugh people, look and laugh.
Guess who isn't pregnant with a random sex ocean baby?!?!
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
Places I vomited today: hotel bathroom, in the cab to the airport, airport bathroom, airport terminal trashcan, plane seat 18E, and the plans bathroom
Fun wedding?
Yes. Very.
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
Randomize
