Whoever said drinking more helps a hangover didn't drink 96% of a fifth of whiskey last night. This is absurd.
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
WE'RE FINALLY ADMITTING THAT WE DESPERATELY WANT TO SCREW EACH OTHER. THIS IS WHAT PROGRESS FEELS
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
I have lots of feelings today, but drunk is my favorite.
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
If thou doesn't answer thou phone thou shall receive a barrage of Dick pics. It's the eleventh commandment.
When that wave blew your top off I heard someone yell "SPANK BANK"
As a former fat girl, that's probably the best compliment I've ever received ever!
My sober self will be embarrassed tomorrow. For now I am laughing my ass off.
SOS YOU NEED TO TAKE THE CANDY PANTIES OUT OF THE GLOVE COMPARTMENT BEFORE MOM TAKES MY CAR
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
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