She's JV to your varsity
Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
I'm going to fuck my way out of the friend zone if its the last thing I do
Your tequila is gone. I suggest you bring more home before you go out for dinner. Money is taped to mailbox.
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
I told her we had to stay at the bar until at least midnight because that's when my direct deposit hit, don't tell me i'm not responsible
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
Yes. With one-hundred percent positivity I can say yes, I do not want you covered in waffles and syrup when I come home.
True life: I inadvertently fucked a whole friend group. More details to come tonight.
Randomize
