i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
Food poisoning on first date... Still rode the mechanical bull like a champ
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
Oh, now I remember why I deleted your number. You're kind of a dick. Please delete mine.
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
So my step mom just informed me she tells stories about me at work as a form of birth control for the girls that work there, not sure if i should be offended or proud.
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
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