Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
Bring more bourbon. Day drunk just hit another level.
Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
The highlight of your blackout was when you drunk showered with the garden hose and emailed your boss your vacation requests for the next year.
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo.
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
Yup, found the vomit in the side compartment. My bad.
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
Randomize
