matts gf stood and watched my naked ass gather my clothes off his floor this morning. sweet.
I just bought the big bottle of Patron. It looks small. What have I done with my life?
Succeeded.
a drug dealer just gave me his business card. it had his face on it drinking a 40oz
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
I'm gonna vom. In the dentist chair. Who makes a dentist appt for July fucking 5th.
He's bought his dick a cell phone. A cell phone. For his dick...
He gave me the number and told me that I if I want to hook up again, I have to call his penis.
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
Just applied for assistance with paying my hospital bill from my alcohol poisoning at age 16 while still a little drunk from last night. What is my life.
Circle of life?
I think the moment I knew you were going to black out was when I told you how many shots you had already and you were shocked and then poured another one
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
I've decided that buying my first unused mattress has been my first major step into real adulthood.
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
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