I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
i feel like someone uncorked me like a wine bottle and pulled a living animal outta my arse.
we were in your room and your mom was singing twinkle twinkle little star in the hallway. so you decided to scream "twinkle? TWINKLE! What Fucking little star?!"
I can die happy now, I have been kicked out of strip clubs on six different continents
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
in hindsight, the duct tape banana hammock was a bad idea.
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
I think the multiple Sunday morning sirens outside my window are a plot by the cops to get back at me for the shit we pulled last night. Or I should move to a better area.
His rebound girl is half his size, looks like a leprechaun, is majoring in theater studies and has arms like Rosie O'donnell. Do I win?
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
It turns out my English teacher used to pose for Playboy. She's an inspiration.
There is a stockpile of mangos and vodka in my backyard and I'm at least 90% sure you had something to do with it.
So I sniffed too hard this morning before work and I THINK THE COCAINE JUST STARTED ROUND 2.
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
Randomize
