Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
Can you please come and collect your boss off of my kitchen floor.
Officially conquered sex on my couch with my dad asleep in the next room
I like how you say "conquered" as if that was your sole mission in life
Does sweetest day count when you're spending it with your fuck buddy, high and eating Pizza Hut?
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
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