She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
Also adulthood=replacing meals with bourbon. And not getting your hair caught in a fan.
Let's be honest, your relationships fail because the man you're looking for is the equivalent of an intellectual blow-up doll.
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
Are you awake? Because I would like to know whether or not I should refrain from giving my evil laugh when I enter the apartment...
At the drs she looked at my back saw your scratch marks and asked "does your back itch a lot?"
He wouldn't let me put a red handprint on his face or scream to him everytime he walked away.
Why did you want to do any of that?
If someones last name is Wilson, you are obligated to pretend that you are Tom Hanks and they are a Volleyball and quote the movie when you speak to them.
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
Are cops allowed to hit on you if they're in uniform?! Serious question.
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
I thought you were dead but then you asked me if your tits looked good. They did.
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
You know you're getting old when you pick up hot sorority girls at the bar, and they write down their phone number, and under it 'we're great babysitters!'
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
Randomize
