are you still at the devil's house?
As a pleasant surprise..I woke to find a Burrito and Bottle of Gatorade .....Merry XMAS to ME
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
high people should be assigned attendants
I wanted to dispute a few 411 charges on my phone bill. The service rep told me I called them four times asking for Lady Gaga's number.
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
I just peed in a flower pot on the veranda while crying and holding a drink
Is it frowned upon to bring a flask to the er?
If you ever insult pizza rolls again, I will dragon kick you in the throat
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
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