WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
Did you seriously take investment advice from our coke dealer?
I tried exercising today. I ended up masturbating to the Wii fit trainer.
I am going to be fat forever.
Between my vag yelling at me for having bad sex and my legs yelling at me for going to the gym I cant hear myself think.
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
Duuuuuuuude, I need you to sleep with my girlfriend so I can tell you both to move out
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
Thanks for the reference. If your boss hires me, I'll buy you a drink.
If my boss hires you, I'm going to need it.
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
Randomize
