He is such a gentleman, he paid for my plan b
It was like a fairy tale, until he tried to put it in my ass...
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
From now on when a guy sends me a dick picture I'm going to send them a picture of some other dudes dick.
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
I asked her why she was drunkenly masturbating to Iron Man and all she replied was "Robert Downey Jr". As far as excuses go, that seemed pretty legit.
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
I just got promised sex at a fire station tonight so basically all my porn star dreams are coming true.
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
The reason why I poison my organs is so that you guys can't sell them.
I quit doing blow for him. If that doesn’t say “I’m in love with you and want to marry you” idk what does
Randomize
