my brain is sober enough to have a conversation.. but my arms feel nice
seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
Of course the bar would go completely silent right as I yell out "I don't have AIDS"
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
At the end of the date, he asked if he could kiss me. I really wanted to say "dude, I didn't shave for nothing"
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
Randomize
