I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
Found my smoke alarm in a ziploc in my toilet...again
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
He drew a face on his balls with a sharpie. It was like giving head to a unicorn.
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
New wedding record, my shirt was off by 8pm!!!
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Wesley from the Princess Bride. I kept telling him what I wanted him to do and all he would say was "as you wish"
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
Not really how I planned to achieve immortality, but I'll take it.
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
Randomize
