theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
I am making pancakes and watching Spongebob Squarepants. My life is a waste of youth.
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
I know it was your bday but bringing a airhorn and blowing it yelling "buy me a fucking shot" in the bartenders face was a little uncalled for
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
My boobs smell like weed again. This happens way too often.
I'm not sure what happened last night but my dog has a red cup taped to his back with a little beer and a ping pong ball in it..
We invented a new game.
I've been trying to fall asleep with ice packs covering my vagina for the last hour... Sorry for being vulgar. I'm going to kill myself.
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
The problem with adderall is that no matter what I'm doing, I feel like it was the most productive thing I've EVER done.
Did you alphabetize our spice cupboard again?
...You'll thank me later.
THERE IS JIZZ ON MY CEILING. HOW THE FUCK IS THERE JIZZ ON MY CEILING
Randomize
