Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
Nothing says I have a hang over like telling your boss to "eat your shit"
How drunk are u on a scale of one to couldn't get it up if u had a gun at ur head?
Moral of the story: don't have drunken shower sex with the lights off...or you WILL break your foot. And the shower knobs.
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
ACTUALLY FUNNIEST MOMENT OF THE NIGHT WAS WHEN YOU WERE TALKING TO HIM AND YOU SAID "WHEN YOU MEET ME IN REAL LIFE I WILL BE A LOT ANGRIER." And then he said "WHEN I MEET YOU IN REAL LIFE I WILL BE LESS DRUNK, HOPEFULLY."
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
I started my period on international women's day. It's like the world is congratulating me and punishing me for being a woman at the same time
Idk what y'all are doing but I just want you to know I'm home and if I hear him say "slap it" one more time I'm moving out
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
Date with Air Force guy was nice btw. And for my next trick I'll talk him into fucking me in his fighter jet at 30,000 ft.
So drinking that old rum that I found in the ceiling of my dorm was prob not my best idea. But good news: my puke was so colorful b/c of all the skittles i ate
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