i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
using my metrocard to split lines. it says optimism on the back. i am optimistic that you will appear at my door and help me finish all these drugs.
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
I didn't want to have to tell you this, violating our brother/sister code not to discuss these things but: for the love of christ stop inviting that 21 year old idiot I slept with for six months to EVERY PARTY WE THROW.
The slot machines are wishing me happy birthday. Mission success.
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
Multi-day drunkenness is to binge drinking as black diamonds are to skiing. They're tough and confusing and you hurt afterwards, but you did it and you probably got an alright story along the way.
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
Just looked at my bank statement. 9 out of 10 transactions on the first page were from 9 different bars. The 10th was for birth control pills at the pharmacy. I need to rethink my lifestyle.
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
What's a professional way to say get your shit in gear?
Randomize
