Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
I just had teddy grams, ritz crackers, and twizzlers for dinner. Hello, end of the semester.
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
she was mad because i didn't remember our fuckaversary. fuck buddies are getting too demanding..
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
Just blew a guy who had the same phone case as me. It was destiny.
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
I THINK HE DOES. OMG!!!!! OMG I FUCKED A GUY W A FAKE LEG AND I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW!!!!!!????!!!!!!!!!
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
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