We named our party play list daddy issues
If burritos were dicks, we'd have a serious relationship problem on our hands. Just saying.
do you really not remember him getting up at like 4am with a leaf blower running through the house and telling people to "WAKE THE FUCK UPPP"
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
You are not allowed to borrow my car ever again. It smells like a hobo orgy happened in my backseat with a hint of onion. What did you do.
Ok, was I really fucked up or was there a chick from Norway in the ice cream shop teaching us Norwegian last night?
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
Update- I sold my hat to some drunk kid for 50 bucks. I used my earnings to buy beer on the way home. I realize to everyone else seeing me drinking on my balcony at 6am, I look like an alcoholic, but I'm thinking of it as a night cap
So as I left the Australian's hotel room, I said "Welcome to America. You're going to do just fine here."
Is it weird to say that Kobe reminds me of a wise brontosaurus?
Update: That guy is no longer in the restroom, so he's probably not dead.
come over. We can flirt with the criteria for substance abuse and talk about our daddy issues
I drank too much tequila. I'm hyperventilating. Send help. I think I slipped through satan's asshole.
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
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