Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
Emee failed...She used my genitals as a tampon
Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
You drew a lightning bolt on your eye and stomach in eye liner and made me sing Poker face with you in harmonies. I never knew you were still a music major when you were drunk.
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.
Did you really just use your nipple as a unit of measurement?
Last night I had sex with one of the groomsmen I was in the wedding with. In a stairwell. 13 years my senior. Thinking I should retire from the bridesmaid gig.
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
I seriously just drove by a man walking down the street wearing hospital scrubs, an 80s track jacket, gold necklace and carrying a flute.
Pretty sure my idea of standards went out the window when I hooked up with a guy who had a rooster tattoo with an arrow pointing down to his no no bits. Think about it.
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
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