I have a new suitor he got my # last nite... I was to tipsy to function! What was I thinking!! It's like u when u first met me
sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
the only evidence i have from this weekend existing is a title page for a novel i tried writing called "the oyster who gave up drinking"
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
Some girl at the bar was showing us her chipped tooth as a pick up line.
You know I'm having a rough day when I'm curled up in the corner eating Spaghettios.
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
I thought i was doing pretty well but I walked into my first class and everyone on my side of the room immediately asked how drunk and high I was
Remember when we thought adulthood would be different than college?
It is different. We had hopes and dreams back then. Now we're just alcoholics.
Randomize
