There's trophy wives that arent even in the 5th grade yet
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
Hey, I'm probably about to be arrested but I didn't want to wake you. But it would be cool of you to get the $500.00 I have in the box I keep my "medicine" in and come bail me out. Also I figured you would be amused at the thought of me fending off brutal prison rape tonight.
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
You had to dry your pants with the hand dryer in the bathroom because you "forgot to take it out."
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
You can say goodbye to our security deposit.
Already? What he do?
Opened a bag of topsoil at the party and spread it all over the living room. TOPSOIL!
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
Randomize
