Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
I was just texting to see if your vagina was working yet.
So I just bought underwear that says "I'm taken." Just know that when I cheat on my bf with you, that's what I'm wearing
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
I hit a child with a fudge sickle from a moving vehicle after he flipped me off, I feel like a God. Tell no one. My partner didn't see it.
Why are your underwear on my dining room table?
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
Your next boyfriend should be from MENSA...you're so smart, it's intimidating as fuck. My penis retracted in fear.
My sister's exploding appendix just cock blocked me...
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
He ain't mine yet. Gotta have a third date before I pee on him and mark territory.
Oh. Wait. That happened on the second date.
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
Randomize
