oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
How can people commit suicide when things like bagels exist
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking if you had a pulse
After the Jell-o shots and about 6 shots of lighter fluid brand tequila, it got to the point where breathing was painful. All I could do was pray I didn't fall asleep in the front yard.
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
Randomize
