I cockslap morals
i just met a girl who was sent to the hospital for using her phone as a vibrator and got electrocuted. 4 weeks later she got sent back for shoving a hot dog up there. welcome to the teenage american society
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
Don't worry I'm alive. The apt is all locked up so I'm sleeping on the patio. The frozen pizza I got might be toast unless someone lets me in soon. If not its all good I'll be here snoring on the patio
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
If you get home and there is an older woman there, its my mom. She wants to come and see the place after work. Just an FYI. Not the older sluts I bang.
When you have to have Siri remind you that you're on your period cuz you're so drunk you keep forgetting about tampons it might be time to call it a night.
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
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