i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
ive had 594 apples! thats 99 apples 6 times! math!
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
He waited til after we had sex to tell me he had herpes... Ugh I hate being drunk
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
Just filled the brita up in the bathtub because we couldn't get it into the sink.
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
Oh it's not a problem. Cleaning up the yard and disposing of 75 gallons of Jello is all I've got to look forward to today.
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
Uhm I have a bottle of tequila, a gallon of orange juice, and leggings. Now ask me again how hard im going? And that doesn't cover tomorrow.
Getting a lap dance from a girl you went to high school with really isn't as awkward as you'd think
And she called me out by name, nothing could have made it more awkward but it ended up not being that bad
I feel awkward having to tell people “sorry you can’t finger me because I will get a UTI and I don’t have health insurance”
Randomize
