Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
alone in the kitchen at 4 am eating a hotdog.
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
I just found out you can file for divorce online. I love America.
you know its a sad night when you can actually see and hear sitcoms on at the bar
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
Guess what happened to me today at work?
I have chlamydia. What happened.
Oh lets talk about your news first. Mine is happy so it should go second.
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
Randomize
