Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
Frozen pudding on a popsicle stick. Bill Cosby would be so proud of drunk me.
Before I left he insisted on serenading me with a ukalele. I might be a little bit in love
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
He ripped off my pantyhose and all I could think was, "oh no those were clinic-appropriate!" That's what I get for ditching a continuing education meeting to go hook up with my scuba instructor.
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
I've had more jaegerbombs than I can count on 3 fingers
He ain't mine yet. Gotta have a third date before I pee on him and mark territory.
Oh. Wait. That happened on the second date.
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
We had a pink drink in honor of my underwear and apparently I made out with our bartender... a few times
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