if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
Friend I haven't seen in almost a year just IMed me to let me know that my mom stuck her boob out the window on the freeway at her.
Her mom responded by mooning my mother. I really don't know what's worse.
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
yea i thought the egg drop soup tasted weirdly like cum, and then i suddenly remembered what happened last night.
i'm never eating chinese again.
I just want you to know that I hid the weed. Once you find another job, I'll tell you where it is. Happy Hunting, bro.
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
I should've realized you were drunk when you began to point at my crotch while yelling "Funland!!!"
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
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