My cat gives me a boner
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
Just packed a snack to eat on the way to McDonald's. That stoned.
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
I'm bleeding and have questions
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
Randomize
